If only we could get Muslims to boycott all airlines, we could dispense with airport security altogether.
— Ann Coulter
I love the idea of the Great Wall of Trump.
I thought the irreducible requirements of Republicanism were being for life, small government, and a strong national defense.
I think I'm perfectly reasonable.
Instead of arguing about whether we're allowed to describe Muslim terrorists as 'Muslim terrorists,' why don't we argue about whether it's a good idea to be letting in so many immigrants who then blow up the Boston Marathon?
There is nothing you can tell me to discourage me.
I have to say I'm all for public flogging. One type of criminal that a public humiliation might work particularly well with are the juvenile delinquents, a lot of whom consider it a badge of honor to be sent to juvenile detention.
We just want Jews to be perfected, as they say. That is what Christianity is. We believe the Old Testament, but ours is more like Federal Express.
My only regret with Timothy McVeigh is he did not go to the 'New York Times' Building.
The Dead's best venues were the outdoor concerts. I've been to a few, including one outside of Kansas City on the Fourth of July, but my fave was Shoreline Amphitheatre - a beautiful outdoor arena built on a landfill.
The first time I heard 'Sharknado,' I thought it was a late-night infomercial for a new vacuum cleaner. Could have swore I ordered one once. Then I found out what it was and remembered that I grew up reading the 'Sharknado' novels.
Liberals decided it's much better not to play outraged with me anymore. I sell lots of books that way.
The government is keeping detailed records on how many Americans have carports. How many Americans have mold in their bathroom.
I'm happy every day. You know, that moment when you first wake up in the morning, and you're just finishing your dream, like you're a dog chasing a post truck - and then you realize, 'Oh no, I'm a human, and I'm awake, and it's Trump's America!
Americans don't want immigration. They don't want any more. Why can't we have a home? You see on 'National Geographic,' 'Oh, the indigenous people, they have a home.' Everyone else can have a home. We are the only people on Earth not allowed to have a home.
If we continue to dump more Mexican immigrants on the country, we'll get to the point that we'll never have another Republican president.
My faith and reason tell me that God created the world, and I'm not particularly interested in the details. I'll find out when I meet my Maker.
The Republican Party's typical position is to preemptively surrender whenever liberals start yelling 'Oh that's mean. You can't use that word': 'Oh I did not realize that 'The New York Times' made a finding that the term 'anchor baby' is offensive. Henceforth I shall not use it.'
Americans have always understood the danger of mobs. They are always dangerous; they are always demonic.
I played sports. I had boyfriends. I loved high school.
I think maybe it's time for liberals to not start weeping when I say things like 'retard' or 'illegal alien.'
Trump is like a Shakespearean 'fool': he seems crass because he speaks the truth.
Liberals love America like O.J. loved Nicole.
God gave us the earth. We have dominion over the plants, the animals, the trees.
No matter what argument you make against evolution, the response is, 'Well, you know, it's possible to believe in evolution and believe in God.' Yes, and it's possible to believe in Spiderman and believe in God, but that doesn't prove Spiderman is true.
My first albums as a little kid were Elton John's 'Goodbye Yellow Brick Road,' Simon and Garfunkel's 'Greatest Hits' - and 'Workingman's Dead.' How many other people still listen to the music they liked at age 12?
I think I went to 67 'Grateful Dead' shows. I'm the only 'Deadhead' who doesn't know the precise number, and it's totally humiliating.
My greatest acting performance was pretending to enjoy the movie 'Selma'.
Liberals watch MSNBC; conservatives watch Fox. They don't want to hear ten seconds of a liberal on Fox, and they don't want to hear ten seconds of a conservative on MSNBC.
As the name of the agency suggests, 'Department of Defense,' the defense refers to the United States of America - not the defense of South Korea, not the defense of Ukraine, not the defense of Syria or Germany.
Every day is morning in Trump's America!
I'm an American. I have constitutional rights.
I'd like to move Israel to the northern border of Mexico and see what happens then.
Confiscatory taxation enforced by threat of imprisonment is 'stealing,' a practice strongly frowned upon by our Creator.
How about 'anvil babies' - because that is what anchor babies are around the necks of the American taxpayer.
Luckily, voting machines register only 'yes' or 'no,' not 'yes, but I hate myself'.
Comedy is hard. Any idiot can have an opinion.
Why do we let blind people and people in wheelchairs become citizens? I feel sorry for cripples, but that doesn't mean I want them in my country.
My whole career has been an Ann Coulter roast.
There's nothing Trump can do that won't be forgiven.
We should be fingerprinting environmentalists... They are out to destroy the country.
I love it! You know, when I tour college campuses, I always find that the prettiest girls in the room are the ones in the College Republicans.
It's a rule of 'Deadhead-dom' to claim to hate Donna Godchaux and always say, 'Phil makes the band,' though I think that pronouncement was proved inaccurate after Jerry died.
The most irritating movie character for me was that cradle-to-grave commie, Mary Poppins.
I've been acting for years. I always act surprised when Marco Rubio says something stupid.
I'm the female Bob Woodward! If I were a liberal, I couldn't write another book. I'd be so busy collecting awards! I'd be posing for the cover of 'Vanity Fair!'
It's always good, when it comes to immigration, to always be paranoid. You can never be too paranoid.
The best way we serve the people we admire is to tell them the truth.
The Republicans are whistling past the graveyard. If we don't change our policies on immigration, you're going to be looking at Iran Deal after Iran Deal after Iran Deal. I can count on Americans to protect Israel. I don't count on foreigners to care about Israel, and that's who's coming in to vote.
I'm accusing Republicans of thinking the Jews have so much power.
