You have to go to Scotland at all times of the year - in order to appreciate the times when the sun does come out.
— Bill Bailey
When I was in Cardiff, playing with the National Orchestra of Wales, they said they get letters from people complaining if they're smiling during the concert. Nuts, isn't it? As if you have to respect the solemnity of the music by not smiling. Music is this joyful thing that enriches our lives, and you're not supposed to smile?
I hate all those celebrity sculptures like Tussauds, where everyone is dressed in spangly suits and they are all smiling.
There was an existential moment - I don't know if I want to call it crisis - when I turned 50 and I felt 'this is interesting; how did this happen?' It affected me in a way I wasn't expecting. It made me pause for reflection.
I did a show in this tiny town called Longyearbyen. We went snowmobiling around Svalbard and saw Arctic foxes, snow bunting, polar bear footprints and almost got lost in a blizzard.
Family helps you make clearer choices about things. Your priorities become clearer. Your obligations become clearer, and that is something I welcome.
My grandfather had strong opinions. He was an argumentative character and quite staunchly socialist.
I was asked to perform at the Olympics Opening Ceremony. But I was up a tree in Borneo filming a documentary about Alfred Russel Wallace! So it couldn't be done.
I had this plan that David Byrne was going to come through the West Country one day, think, 'Who's that guy?' and ask me to go on tour with them.
Great music and great artists create their own music and look and are not manufactured.
We live in the age of entitlement, as opposed to enlightenment.
There was something about stand-up that music wouldn't give me, which was my love of the spoken word and the mercurial tendency of language to respond to what happens to you.
I used to like beer, but it makes me feel slightly queasy.
I've always been envious of certainty, of people who always seemed to have a plan for their lives.
The devil's in the detail and sometimes if you're thinking too big, you can miss the detail.
When you're a birder, you have all sorts of reference books, and you know about migratory patterns and technical stuff. Most people just look out the window, and say 'is that a pigeon?'
If you're going to perform, you're going to attract criticism. You can't please everyone all the time. You don't know how things are going to come out. But that's part of the fun of it, the adventure of doing any kind of art.
But being in 'Doctor Who' is a dream come true. I've been a fan since I can remember watching TV.
I was asked to do an ad campaign for a supermarket once. I was baffled. It's strange when you realise your popularity or reputation is a marketable commodity; it's a stock, a currency.
Riding a horse and using a phone camera is tricky but if you don't take pictures or record the moment, you lose it. You want to have a record of it.
The Dutch do have a slightly odd sense of humour.
Doing comedy around the world is a way of finding out how people tick.
I was an only child but I never longed for a sibling. It just didn't occur to me.
I have anti-establishment hair.
When you say 'Hello Wembley!' you're not just saying hello to a large shed. You're saying, 'Hello, I'm following all the greats that have played here before.'
Now, with the success of musical comedy like the Mighty Boosh, Flight of the Conchords and Bo Burnham, I feel vindicated.
I'm really grateful for the fact that I have full artistic control over my career. I can choose what film or TV projects I'm interested in doing.
It's been Bill for so long people think my name is William, but it's not, it's Mark.
I don't like labels. I have always fought against that as a stand-up.
I've started doing Bikram yoga. You're in a boiling hot room, bending over pretending to be a locust, you can't do that at the gym.
I've always been reasonably upbeat about most things.
I play the piano and that's how I learned about music. I then taught myself the guitar, drums, percussion and various other things, such as the bazooka, the mandolin, the Theremin, the alpine horn, the didgeridoo.
I think gaming has influenced popular culture in a huge way. It's worked its way into novels, and blockbuster movies.
Twenty-two years I've been doing this comedy lark, so it's been like a meteoric rise to fame... if the meteor was being dragged by an arthritic donkey across a ploughed field, in northern Poland.
It's a lovely moment when everyone's part of something greater than the sum of its parts. That encapsulates what a comedy gig should be, with the comic as the lightning rod, the Norse mischief god, getting the audience to do something they wouldn't necessarily do.
I met Amy Winehouse a few times and she was always funny, charming and self-deprecating - just a delight to be around.
I prefer the simple things and I love walking in the countryside, or going camping... but simplicity is hard. It's easier to over-complicate things.
Melbourne has great eateries and you can go birdwatching.
We are almost in a time beyond jokes, beyond satire. When the Trump era is called the 'post-truth' period, then this is the greatest joke of all, albeit quite depressing.
My mother was a classic matriarchal figure. She'd sing round the house and always had music on.
When the sun shines in Britain there's no finer place on Earth.
I was always part of the end-of-term review at school. We would mercilessly mock any slight weakness in the teachers.
Some musicians are a bit humourless about their art: they lose sight of the fact that as well as exercising their muse, they're there to entertain.
If you become famous but haven't actually achieved anything, then your life has no real meaning - unless you're spectacularly shallow.
My grandparents would have big, long arguments that were entertaining and that's where I first noticed, and was thrilled by, political discourse.
I said to my wife that if I had enough money I'd have my arms lengthened. Slightly longer arms would be great.
I hate getting ill, it irritates me so I try to stay reasonably healthy.
In 1994 I was doing a two-hander with Sean Lock in Edinburgh and there were more people in the cast than the audience. It was pretty grim, quite a chastening experience.
Films and gaming are blurring together, and it makes for brilliant popcorn entertainment.
I didn't have any brothers or sisters, so I did a lot of stuff where I entertained myself playing games, reading a lot, a lot of fantasy novel stuff.
