I can't write at night. For me, I'm programmed to believe that nighttime is for relaxation.
— Diablo Cody
I don't have a terrible singing voice, but I also wouldn't call it 'good.' I can carry a tune.
I really just love to open a blank document and spew, whereas with a screenplay I have to be more judicious.
I myself identify as a recovering Blockhead. You'd be surprised how many twenty- and thirty-something hipster chicks have the NKOTB skeleton in their closet, albeit artfully concealed by stacks of Ksubi skinny jeans and ironic Judas Priest T-shirts.
The Rolling Stones are so versatile, they're like the band version of that Infinite Dress they sell on QVC.
Personally, I consider 'Titanic' the most brilliant example of successful counterprogramming; the film actually countered itself by embedding an epic chick flick within a classic disaster movie.
I normally ignore the History Channel.
Couture gowns are like gremlins; you can't expose them to bright light or get them wet.
I've been watching 'American Idol' since its debut season in 2002. Back then, America hadn't yet evolved into a gladiatorial cybernation of bloggers, tweeters, and self-ordained voice coaches.
As a kid, I spent every summer bent over a stack of books, obsessively writing detailed reports on each one.
The fashion industry isn't merely content to encase my meaty flanks in skintight denim. Oh, no! That denim also has to be white, a color that attracts ketchup, wine, garlic aioli, and any other foodstuffs I might otherwise be able to enjoy if I wasn't wearing ridiculously tight pants.
'Sweet Valley High' is fantastic, fabulous, a little bit campy, and - dare I say it - cinematic.
Hollywood is a perpetual summerland, a temperate, godless yaw where the very word 'season' has been co-opted by television executives. There are few harbingers of winter here.
I would never consent to a lame publicity stunt at a time when I already want to hide.
One nice thing about being a woman in Hollywood is that the women tend to be very close-knit. All of us writers and directors know each other and cling to each other for safety and support, and it's really a completely different vibe than the men experience out here, where they're all trying to murder each other.
There's something magical about spending a Sunday night watching real people at a deli, then watching fake people pretending to be real on TV, then engaging in (arguably) false interaction with (arguably) real people on the Internet. Never at any prior point in time has this been possible.
Judy Blume excels at describing how it feels to be invisible. So how poetic is it that Blume herself is suddenly everywhere?
Well, to aspiring writers, I would tell them that we live in a wonderful time where you're able to make your work visible, easily.
The fact is, when I wrote 'Juno' - and I think this is part of its charm and appeal - I didn't know how to write a movie. And I also had no idea it was going to get made!
I had gone to the bookstore, and while I hadn't bought any books on how to write a screenplay, I'd bought a couple of scripts so I could see how the formatting works. I just needed to know how a Hollywood screenplay looked on the page, which was something I was totally unfamiliar with.
Whether it's a blatant homage or unconscious mimicry, the Rolling Stones have permanently, indelibly influenced how rock stars look and behave.
I've been meaning to write about the Rolling Stones, but I am the furthest thing from a hipster rock journalist.
I think I might be one of the only people in America, or at least the only person I know, who saw both 'The Dark Knight' and 'Mamma Mia!' on their shared opening weekend.
Let it be said that the makeup artist at '90210' made me look better for the fake red carpet than I've ever looked on an actual red carpet.
But here is the single greatest thing about the 'Vanity Fair' party: There are uniformed In-N-Out Burger employees circulating the room with trays of cheeseburgers all night long.
There's something about a roller coaster that triggers strong feelings, maybe because most of us associate them with childhood. They're inherently cinematic; the very shape of a coaster, all hills and valleys and sickening helices, evokes a human emotional response.
If I want to get a taste of beach culture, I'll fire up my season 2 DVD of 'Beverly Hills, 90210.'
Tabloid photos capture people at their most self-conscious and disoriented; in real life, Paris Hilton is like an elegant paper crane.
When I was a kid, I attended a small Catholic school in a south suburb of Chicago.
I've always been a writer, I've always been a storyteller, but I never thought about screenwriting.
You make a first impression and people never forget it. If people want to think of me as the wacky 'Juno' lady forever, I could think of worse ways to be labeled.
For me, I am a huge fan of Sofia Coppola and Lynn Shelton. I love Lena Dunham, like everybody else. I love Kathryn Bigelow.
Los Angeles is often described as the nadir of vapidity, a smog-choked space cradle.
People have always wanted to be recognized, and that's human nature. But people used to want to be recognized for their accomplishments, and now they simply want to be visible.
I hear that 5 o'clock whistle in my mind like Fred Flintstone and I have to stop. I'm also not much of a morning writer. I have a sweet spot from about 11am to 4pm. But I really work during that time.
For me, writing essays, prose and fiction is a great way to be self-indulgent.
I write small and weird. Romcoms are not in my skill set.
These days, the Rolling Stones still have an edge, but that fangs-out ferocity has mellowed considerably.
Now '90210' is returning with an all-new cast of slightly more plausible teens. I'll be honest: I wish the old cast was back. Ideally, this spin-off would be an Ice Storm-esque exploration of the West Beverly gang's bleak adult lives.
A few months ago, I had the pleasure of actually visiting the Playboy Mansion. I saw the peacocks, fed grapes to the monkeys, and even braved the fabled Grotto. After seeing the estate, I understood why anyone would be reluctant to leave.
Fact: The new '90210' is cooler than the old '90210.' It's the lithe, streamlined Skipper to the elder series' venerable Barbie. Gone are the traditional parents - they've been replaced by a hipster mom n' pop who get busted necking in the car.
My boyfriend is Italian and from New Jersey, so naturally he was thrilled to meet Joe Pesci.
I don't know why, but I've always been a sucker for roller coasters in movies.
I know white clothing is supposed to enhance that summer glow, but writers don't tan.
The public's appetite for frothy, flippant blondes has waned, but Paris Hilton still fascinates me.
Speaking of Twitter, I don't even know if I composed a blog entry in 2009, as I was too busy parceling my every thought into cute 140-character sound bites. I used to only worry about being pithy for a living; now some of my best lines are wasted on a free app!
I grew up in the Midwest; you don't know any screenwriters. It didn't seem like a realistic career possibility.
Even though I am in this weird position of being a semi-recognizable screenwriter, which isn't that common, at the same time, I'm not an actress. I'm pretty isolated.
Ah, reality TV: where opportunists delight in exposing opportunism! It's kind of like the indie music scene.
It's actually much harder to develop a TV show than I had anticipated.
