Every day, TV, newspapers, and the Internet bombard us with a message that we're destroying the earth. Ice caps are melting, rivers are dying, polar bears are drowning, and trees are doing something.
— Penn Jillette
When you tell other people to do stuff they don't know how to do, they tend to freak out.
'Zolten' is a common Hungarian name, it's my wife's maiden name and most importantly, it's the name of Dracula's dog.
People still seem to think that they should vote themselves money. They seem to think there is stuff which they think is the government's job, when it's really the individual's job.
You have to be careful as a libertarian because you can sound very Republican.
I'm always fascinated by the use of the first-person plural talking about sports.
If you don't pay your taxes and you don't answer the warrant and you don't go to court, eventually someone will pull a gun. Eventually someone with a gun will show up. I want everything the government does to be done, I just want it to be done voluntarily.
When I was 15, 16, 17 years old, I spent five hours a day juggling, and I probably spent six hours a day seriously listening to music. And if I were 16 now, I would put that time into playing video games.
I think voting for the lesser of two evils in game theory always leads to more evil.
For the most part, any serious magic show is not using very much technology newer than theatrical lights.
Once you have somebody that is telling you, 'We are interpreting God for you,' it seems like you either agree or you don't. You either say, like Martin Luther, 'I'm going to have a direct relationship with the word of God,' or I'm going to go through a conduit of God on Earth,' which would be the Pope.
This is going to sound horrible, but I don't even know how much I make in a year. It must be, you know, a couple of million dollars, a few million. I know it's more money than my dad, a jail guard, made in his lifetime; more money than I'll ever need.
The pure unadulterated disgust of Washington seems to me to be a really good thing.
As much as I disagreed with every second of 'Fahrenheit 9/11,' the fact that it is out made me jump for joy.
Technology adds nothing to art.
Direct confrontation, direct conversation is real respect. And it's amazing how many people get that.
We celebrities are desperate pigs.
All David Blaine is is a good-looking magician.
Everybody is designing magic iPhone apps that do things that are really, really beautiful, but a really important thing about magic is that the gimmick has to be ugly.
For better or worse, in the 21st century, reality shows are the variety show.
I don't think I'm made of the right stuff to be a politician. I think I'm made to be a loose cannon.
If you like the stuff I do, my chances of liking you go up.
Trey Parker did 'Book of Mormon.' It's the best Broadway show I've ever seen. He does 'South Park.' It's wonderful.
I have no evidence that libertarianism leads to a better life. I just think it is morally right.
The one kind of person I have a lot of trouble understanding is the kind of person that says the existence of God or religion doesn't matter, it's not an important decision. I think it's vitally important; it's what all our lives are based on.
I believe the fast track to atheism is reading the Bible. I've read it three times all the way through. It's a big part of our culture, a big part of our history. I don't just read things I agree with.
Even if I disagree with Obama on many, many things, he is certainly qualified to be president. He is certainly competent to be president.
The vast majority of people who have guns never hurt anybody.
I don't believe in vengeance. Really, when all is said and done, I probably don't believe in punishment.
I love the idea that horror and fear is a celebration of health and life.
I have a very specific definition of censorship. Censorship must be done by the government or it's not censorship.
I'm not misunderstood. I am brash. I make my living being brash.
Tolerance is you saying something crazy and me smiling and saying, 'That's nice.'
I never wanted to be a magician. I never wanted to be a comedian. I never wanted to be onstage.
The only difference between Obama and Bush is that Obama is killing more people.
Believing there's no God means I can't really be forgiven except by kindness and faulty memories. That's good; it makes me want to be more thoughtful. I have to try to treat people right the first time around.
The Tea Party claims to want small government.
I don't want people who are in poverty, in pain, or suffering, to suffer because it's for their own good and they can pull themselves up by their bootstraps. I want to help them. I want us all to help them.
'Psycho' is fascinating philosophically, because the point of 'Psycho' is that everything that's bad happens because of love.
My parents were teetotalers and my grandparents were - it's all the way back. It's New English puritanical tradition.
There is this tremendous amount of arrogance and hubris, where somebody can look at something for five minutes and dismiss it. Whether you talk about gaming or 20th century classical music, you can't do it in five minutes. You can't listen to 'The Rite of Spring' once and understand what Stravinsky was all about.
I like movies that are scary, but I don't want them to be dirt dumb. I want a movie that gets my blood racing, makes me laugh, but also gives me something to think about, with maybe a little sexy thrown in. Hollywood doesn't make movies like that.
I like to read in the dark. I like to go into the bathtub, turn out all the lights, and in the dark, read my books.
I'm totally clean and sober my whole life.
The vast majority of people who have mental illness problems never hurt anybody.
When you look at the actual numbers, the number of people who died after 9/11 was greater than the number of people who died in 9/11, even if you are talking Americans. But you know, I don't like to talk Americans. I want to talk everybody. More innocent people died after 9/11 because of 9/11 than died in 9/11.
I love when violent, dangerous art is done by people who are not violent and dangerous. I love that when George Romero was making 'Dawn of the Dead,' he was coaching his son's little league team.
Part of the experience of being entertained is sitting back and plugging into someone else's vision.
Penn & Teller stopped doing practical jokes, and the reason is we got much too good at it.
'Celebrity Apprentice' has more integrity and is the most straightforward show I've ever seen.
