For three months, when I was 23 years old, I worked as a clerk at Wandsworth Sewer.
— Sandi Toksvig
The secret to my success is to work seven days a week. It's as disappointing an answer as the one about how to lose weight. Eat less. Sleep less. Very boring.
Like most women, my weight goes up and down.
I love 'Teach Yourself' books. I bought an old weaving loom and had no time for classes, but one 'Teach Yourself' later, and my bobbin is flying.
If you play-act for a living, it's better not to carry on doing it when you get home.
Do you know there were two pilots made for 'Have I Got News For You' before the series started two decades ago: one hosted by Angus Deayton and one hosted by me. But I was told that they couldn't have a woman in charge of the news.
My wife and I drove across America following the Oregon Trail, which the pioneers once passed along.
I don't think secrets are a good thing. I think they are a cancer of the soul. So I decided to come out.
The truth is I have never been any good at sport, OK?
Is raising boys different from raising girls? Oh my goodness, yes! It's a different species, and I love them for that.
There are panel shows that struggle to get women on, and that's because the women feel marginalised and stupid and in the edit are often seen just laughing at the boys and not saying anything at all even though I know for a fact in the recording they were clever. I'm not shy at speaking up, but even I, on those shows, am silenced.
Social media, to me, has got out of hand. Why can't we all be nice to each other?
I haven't the energy to despise anyone.
I'm political in the sense that there's much to be done, but I'm apolitical in the sense that I don't think there's a party that represents anything I believe in.
Us Danes have amazing pastries, but we're not a fat nation.
I'm trying to get my kids - in particular, my step-daughter Mary, who's 12 - to recommend music to me. You reach a certain age and realise you haven't kept up, but I don't want to fall behind.
I am passionate about higher education and am hugely impressed by Portsmouth's mission to encourage students from every walk of life to excel.
Cheryl Cole is one of the few incredibly famous people who still seems to say what they think. I really like that; plus, I do fancy her quite a bit.
My earliest memory is my parents forgetting my fourth birthday. My dad looked up from reading the paper and went, 'Oh my God!' So we went out, and I chose a red scooter.
'QI' is exactly what the best TV ought to be - you learn something, but you are also crying with laughter.
One of my life's watchwords is 'hyggelig.' It's an untranslatable Danish term for getting together with friends and family and sitting around in a cosy atmosphere with nice food and wine and candles.
I hope I don't have an ego.
Women are not allowed to be polymaths; we're only allowed to do single maths.
I cannot lie on the beach or by a swimming pool. I think I'm too Nordic to like a lot of relentless sun.
I was born gay, OK? I've always known. I don't think my family were the least bit surprised.
I've always liked being able to go around incognito in Copenhagen.
What I think is if the world is in some difficulty - about climate change, about economics - then we had better make sure that 100 per cent of every brain available on the planet is working at full pelt to try to sort these things out.
I get in a temper with inanimate objects. I can't bear plastic. I do get in a complete rage with something that's been shrink-wrapped.
My life won't have full quality until we achieve equality for all.
When people say, 'There aren't enough women on panel shows,' the answer is to make the host a woman.
Food is an international language, an expression of love.
Don't climb into a fridge. That's my advice.
I'm slightly obsessed with women's history, so I'd love to talk to Emily Dickinson or Louisa May Alcott.
Noel Fielding is one of the nicest guys in show business. The first time I met him, I felt like I had met a rather wayward cousin whose take on the world made me laugh.
I will try anything that doesn't involve a leotard.
At my worst, I was a size 22, and at that size, you can't go down the high street and buy yourself things that make you feel good. Your shopping options are limited in a way they aren't when you are a size 12.
I certainly wouldn't want to be a Mini Me of any of the people whose footsteps I've followed in.
My ambition is to stop showing off. I'd love to be a tweedy academic. I'd be happy living in a croft. I like making jam. So why am I a semi-public figure?
I'm quite a shy person, and I dislike narcissism intensely.
Sitting on a plastic chair at night listening to the sea lapping below while sipping a cold beer is about as good as life gets.
When my three children were little, I took them to Rome. On our way to our destination, we went to see the Colosseum and returned to the car to find everything had been stolen. Trying to buy everything for a week, including clothing for three small, very tired children, was a low point in my life.
The fact is, there is not now, nor has there ever been in the whole of history, a single country in the world where women have equality with men.
With my daughters, it didn't matter how much it was not my thing, we went through two truly horrible pink phases. I bought an awful lot of Barbie rubbish, and it was a great day when I was allowed to send Barbie's house to the skip. That was one of the best days of my life.
I think kids are in your temporary care, and that they probably arrive with pretty much the personalities they're going to have. I grew up in a perfectly traditional family and turned out how I did. I'm not sure there's much that the family can do except lots of love and lots of care and lots of chances for them to develop the best they can.
I dislike hatred, offence, unkindness.
I've had a surprising number of near-death experiences: I was nearly blown up by a landmine in Sudan; I was stranded on the Zambezi river at night; I was bucked off a rodeo horse in Arizona and had to be airlifted to hospital; and, worst of all, I once ate a Pot Noodle.
Although I'm sure she's completely charming and delightful, I'm not sure if Kate Middleton might be the best role model. This is a person who has got where she is by marriage, a person whose weight, clothing, hair we worry about - we don't worry about what she's thinking.
You can go anywhere in the world, and people's faces light up when they put delicious food in their mouths.
I've downloaded the BBC's 'Cranford' with Judi Dench because I like a bit of bonnet acting, and I can turn it on and off without worrying about whether I can follow what's happening.
I can't live without Radio 4. It's worth the entire licence fee. I'm an obsessive listener; I get up, and Radio 4 goes on, but it goes off when 'Thought for the Day' starts, as that's a step too far.
