My kids are the offspring of people who are doing reasonably well and live in the centre of London and the chances are they're going to turn out ghastly anyway. Who's to say they shouldn't have a walk-in wardrobe and possibly a stylist from the age of four?

Things I am allergic to: people who believe in star signs and think nothing of starting a conversation with: 'Hi, my name's Lucy. I'm a Sagittarius;' rodents (apart from miniature hamsters, which are not in fact rodents but small, breathing, brown balls of cotton wool); and people who go to the gym.

If you asked 100 women on the street who they'd like to be, I'm sure most of them would say Kirsty Wark or Germaine Greer. Yawn. Do me a favour - they're lying.

Claudia Winkleman Quotes