We fear the arrival of immigrants that we have drawn here with the wealth we stole from them. For much of the rest of the world we must be the focus of bitter amusement, characters in a satire we don't understand. It is British people that don't learn languages, or British history. Britain is the true scrounger, the true criminal.

They say that the older you get, the more conservative you become: perhaps that's the reason there are no Tories in Scotland.

The SNP are far from radical, but they do have a knack for producing the odd simple, progressive policy that's hard to argue against.

Frankie Boyle Quotes