My face is oblong. But the best grooming is confidence.

When you get into a car, and there's trash, or it's dirty, or one of the hubcaps is off, you're like, 'Come on, dude.' Every woman likes the confidence and self-respect that says, 'I get oil changes. I look after my vehicle.' That's what I recommend: Act like you don't care, but take care of your body.

I've stated that it's possible the only reason I'm in show business is that I have such a strange, particular head of hair. That, and I can grow a red beard.

T. J. Miller Quotes